Never Knew Love Like This Before Read online

  “Please don’t let me go, I think I will fall.” She smiled sheepishly.

  “I will never let you fall,” he whispered in her ear, causing his hot breath to sear her skin and palpitate her heartbeat. They seemed oblivious to the rest of the world, the stares of those looking at this black woman and this white man in the heart of Düsseldorf, Germany, kissing like longtime lovers.

  He walked her back to her hotel suite and stood outside the door.

  “Thank you for a very nice time, Simon, I didn’t expect to be enjoying myself so, and with my own personal tour guide.” She licked her lips and hoped he would ask to come in. She didn’t want to come off as being too aggressive, not knowing his culture and the ways of the women there, but she didn’t want the night to be over, even though it was already so late.

  “I had a wonderful time as well.” He reached in and brushed his lips one last time gently against hers and then turned to leave.

  “Bye,” she said, moving to close the door.

  “Morgan. I have a very important business meeting tomorrow early, and I am supposed to be heading back to Frankfurt on Thursday. Aber, I mean, but if you don’t mind, I would like to hang around until the Monday when you leave for America. Maybe show you around some more. Go karaoke in Cologne and take the train over to Amsterdam maybe? What do think?” His boyish charm and exuberance for life titillated her.

  “I would love that. If you are sure I am not interrupting anything,” she agreed.

  “No no, this is wonderful. The best time I have now in a long time, all because of you. You make me a happy man in this moment,” he told her, kissing her once more before leaving. “I call you in the evening tomorrow when work is finished,” he yelled back as she closed the door behind her, and with her back pressed firmly to the door she sank to the floor. What have I gotten myself into now? she thought, smiling broadly.

  She looked at the time and calculated what time it was in New York. It was almost midnight in Germany, making it almost 6:00 A.M. in New York. She decided she would take a shower and order in a midnight snack. By the time she did all that it would be about eight in the morning and Alexandra would already be at her desk. Besides, she needed to check in the office anyway and see how things were going with her abrupt absence.

  Alexandra shrieked when she heard Morgan’s voice on the other end of the line.

  “I was just thinking about you since you didn’t call to let me know you arrived safely yesterday and that you were okay. I was starting to get worried,” Alex told her, moving to her desk and sitting comfortably, kicking off her shoes and putting up her legs to rest on the edge of her deep mahogany desk.

  “I am fine; you know you don’t have to worry about me.”

  “Okay, spill the beans.”

  “What?”

  “Girl you are as high as a kite and blushing like a Catholic schoolgirl who just got her first kiss; spill it now.”

  “You can tell all of that on the phone?” Morgan asked, surprised that Alexandra picked up on her happiness.

  “Well, not exactly but you just sound so happy, nothing like the woman who left here almost two days ago.”

  “Really?” Morgan asked, blushing.

  “Yes, now spill it!” her friend demanded, waiting anxiously to find out what had happened to change Morgan’s disposition in such a short time.

  “Okay, here goes. . . .” And Morgan told Alexandra what happened from beginning to end, moment by moment. Alexandra was on the edge of her seat drooling by the time she completed her tale telling.

  “OH . . . MY . . . GOSH!” was all Alexandra could say. “What is it about you that you just keep reeling them in? Don’t you ever stop? Girl, how do you do it? Please bottle whatever it is you have and sell some to me.” She rambled.

  “Oh stop, it’s nothing like that. But Alex, he is so wonderful. He is nothing like the other guys. He is cultured, speaks multiple languages, well traveled, has everything he needs, his own business, his own job, his own home, and most importantly his own money.” She bubbled.

  “I know, and the thing about him that gets me is that he is younger.”

  “Younger? How much younger?”

  Morgan pretended to cough and cleared her throat. “Seven years younger,” she mumbled.

  “Okay, a white guy, who’s got it all together and seven years younger. Now that’s something.” She wrapped up nonjudgmentally, “I guess I would want a fine specimen like that too. You know they say that a man reaches his peak at twenty-one and a woman at thirty. Sounds like a perfect match,” she teased.

  “You know, you do have a point,” Morgan admitted and they laughed heartily together.

  “So what are you going to do about the guys here?” Alexandra questioned, thinking back to the original reason why she had to leave. “Are you over them, not going to pick any? What?”

  “Well, I just met the guy, Alex; so much is not going to change in less than one day. I just wanted to tell you how good he makes me feel, how different he is.”

  “How do you think your family would take this? The guys?”

  “My mother is white and my father is black. Both me and my baby sister are mixed, exactly how are they going to take it if I chose someone of a different culture? They did and things worked out just fine.”

  “I suppose you are right, but you know how things are on the racism tip. The brothers feeling like white men are taking all of our good women and the women feeling like all the good brothers are going to white women. Do you think you could handle an interracial relationship?”

  “You know something, girlfriend. I just met Seymen, and I feel wonderful. For once in a very long time my body is truly alive at just the thought of a man.”

  “You slept with him already?” Alexandra asked, incredulous.

  “No, silly. I just said that my body feels alive. I am not stressing about picking a choice, I am just relaxing and enjoying myself. No drama and exaggerated courtship from men who won’t even think twice to send flowers once they are married. Just pure simple hand holding, spontaneous kissing and enjoying a good time. Is that a crime?” Morgan asked, frustrated.

  “I don’t suppose it is, I just asked that’s all.” They paused for a minute while Alexandra absorbed Morgan’s news.

  “Well, if nothing else you are getting rest and something new is always good to uplift the spirit and shed new light on a situation.” She smiled, hoping Morgan would get her drift. “Just do what you went there for, to relax and to think. By the time you are home you should be feeling bright-eyed and bushy tailed,” she continued.

  “You are right. Well, in other news, how is Flowers Bed doing?”

  “Awesome, I told you I would be on top of things. That last advertiser we were waiting for came on, I signed on the dotted line and with that we have superseded our budget,” Alexandra bragged.

  “Awesome, I knew I could count on you.”

  “Thanks, Morgan.”

  “No, thank you, my dear. Now I have to get to bed and you have work to do.” They said their good-byes shortly after and Morgan fell asleep and had a long peaceful, dreamless sleep.

  She spent her time in Germany resting and not venturing too far away from the hotel for fear of getting lost and not exactly knowing what she wanted to do since her trip was impulsive. Thursday couldn’t come fast enough and when it did, she waited for Simon to ring her. It was almost noon on Thursday before he arrived and knocked on her door and before that she felt as though he might have forgotten. She had a wonderful time in Germany as they rented a vehicle and traveled on the autobahn from Frankfurt, to Cologne, to Wiesbaden where he grew up, and to Berlin. They went dancing, sang at a few karaoke bars and listened some as Simon played his guitar and serenaded her. She met his friends, his sisters, visited his business and was able to see his home before he had to take her back to Düsseldorf to prepare for her long flight back to the United States.

  Late that Sunday night as he kissed her passionately she began to cry and s
o did he.

  “I will miss you, schatzy.” He called her in the new name she had become accustomed to. A name commonly used in Germany to refer to your partner and life lover.

  “I will miss you too,” she told him curling into the comfort of his massive arms and broad chest, as they lay together in her hotel room, her things already packed for her early morning flight.

  “What will I do now without you? I waited so long for a woman like you, I prayed so often for a woman to come into my life.” He chuckled softly and she relished the deep huskiness of his voice. “I just never thought that she would be a beautiful black woman and from thousands of miles away in another country. No wonder you were so hard to find,” he whispered playfully to her.

  “It’s not so bad. You can visit with me and when I have vacation I will also visit with you,” she told him lightly.

  At her words he gently eased her away from him to look into her eyes. Tears silver streaking the beautiful sky blue of his irises.

  “I don’t want that we wait so long. I want you to be mine. Please Morgan, be mine?” he asked, his voice choked to an almost inaudible whisper. As she looked at him, felt the heat he created between her thighs, and ran her hands through his soft curly blond hair, she thought of a thousand reasons why she should say no. A thousand reasons why she could not just say yes to a man who had made her feel wholesome, complete, and loved in a genuine, sincere, and honest way. All things she wanted and hadn’t had in any of the other men who sought to have her belong to him. But as she opened her mouth to say no, she too was surprised as she watched his frown turn to a smile.

  “Yes.”

  “Yes? Oh meine schatz, meine Machen, meine Prinzessin.” He babbled on in German calling her his love, his woman, his girl and his princess. Swept away in his excitement, they made love for the first time and spent the night wrapped in each other’s arms.

  Saying good-bye to her on Monday morning was the most difficult thing he had ever done. He walked away the instant she went through the checkpoint. He just couldn’t bear to see her leave him, for the first time he had fallen head over heels in love with a woman and he was letting her walk away. When she turned around he was gone and she felt completely sad and empty. Seymen sat in his car as tears cascaded down his cheeks and vowed that he would take the next flight to America the first chance he got to visit her.

  Morgan’s flight was long as she traveled back homeward bound. She had mixed feelings and felt even more confused going back home than when she left. Now she had another man to throw into the mix and the only problem she could see with him was that he was white.

  When Life Hurts

  Morgan dropped her bags and walked over to her phone pressing the voice mail button, which indicated that she had over thirty new messages. After playing them she found there was an almost even split between Troy, Bruce, and Isaiah all wanting to know where she was, why they couldn’t reach her on her mobile, work or home number and when will she give them a call back. There were two very important messages registered on her phone that she had to respond to as the words caught her breath she began to dial.

  “Momma, what’s wrong? Is Sienna okay?”

  “Hey baby, it’s so good to hear from you. I was worried sick when you didn’t call back after we left the message two days ago,” her mother told her. She sounded as though she had been crying and panic overcame Morgan.

  “What did they say Momma, is Sienna going to be all right? Is she still in the hospital?”

  “Yes, baby. Normally when the sickle cells block the flow of blood, she would get the pain episodes and the last time she had lung tissue damage. But this time it’s in her arms, legs, chest, and abdomen. She had a stroke baby. The doctors kept her in the hospital. She might also have spleen, kidneys, and liver damage.” Her mother broke out into a fresh burst of tears.

  “Morgan sweetie, we are heading out to the hospital now to see her. I will call you later, okay?” her mother said before abruptly hanging up. Morgan knew that her dad was having a pretty hard time. Her mom didn’t handle stress or pressure very well. This is not what she wanted to come back to, her baby sister in the hospital.

  She picked up the phone and began to dial when it rang.

  “Hello Isaiah.” Morgan was not happy to hear from him at this time. She just wanted to get a rental and drive up to Chicago. Driving would be better because it would give her a chance to think and not get there too fast. She hated seeing her baby sister in the hospital and it doesn’t get easier with time.

  “Hey sweetie, I have missed you.”

  “I am sorry I cannot talk right now Isaiah. I have to get to Chicago.” There was a brief silence before he responded.

  “Well okay, but can you give me a call when you get a chance, babe? I would like to talk to you.” She snickered internally at his passive behavior. He never pushed the envelope, never asked that extra question even when she desperately needed him to. How was she supposed to know he cared? Well it didn’t matter; she had to get to her parents.

  “Sure, Isaiah, I don’t know when that will be as I have an emergency in my family. But I will call you when I get a chance.” She baited him, wondering if he cared enough about her and what she was going through to find out what was wrong. His answer disappointed her more, but she knew she couldn’t be with someone who wasn’t willing to go to bat for her, to put himself on the line.

  “Okay baby, talk to you then.” She hung up the phone feeling like screaming.

  “Why do you have to be so damn predictable Isaiah, why?” she screamed as she stormed through the house. She grabbed her purse and ran out without her overnight suitcase. She hailed a Yellow cab and was on her way to the nearest car rental spot. She didn’t have to wait long before she was in a midsize vehicle and driving to Chicago like she had done many times before. When her cell phone rang she looked and saw it was Alexandra and answered.

  “Hey, girlfriend. I cannot wait to hook up with you later and hear all about your German adventures,” Alexandra chirped.

  “That’s not going to happen, Alex. I’m sorry.”

  “Morgan are you okay? You sound like you’ve been crying.”

  “I’m all right. It’s just that Sienna is sick again. My mom says it’s actually bad this time, the pain is so horrible they have admitted her now for a couple days.”

  “Oh sweetie, I am so sorry.”

  Morgan tried to wipe the tears away from her eyes, as her vision was getting blurry. She drove as fast as she could, taking the George Washington Bridge; she sped through New Jersey and was on 80 West to Illinois in no time.

  “Just let everyone know you will be acting executive during this interim for me. I will be back as soon as possible.”

  “No problem, hon, just drive carefully, okay. Slow down and don’t panic, your sister is going to be okay. This has happened before and she is always okay, right?” Alexandra tried to reason with her in order to calm her friend down. She knew Morgan was under a lot of stress even though she refused to allow her emotions to flow out into an obvious call for help, always afraid to rely on someone else, always insisting on being strong. Alexandra knew her friend’s weakness and wanted to help her in whatever way she could without putting her vulnerabilities on the frontline.

  Morgan kept wiping her tears. She knew she was only feeling sorry for herself, beating herself up about not having a steady man in her life, wanting to have children, wishing Isaiah could be the man in her life, just a little more passionate; she would even deal with the age thing. The tears just kept coming. She reached to the glove compartment to retrieve a napkin and jumped when she heard someone blaring their horn at her. Swerving out of the way she realized that she had veered into oncoming traffic and quickly righted the car as the drivers cursed vulgarities at her.

  “Whoa, what was that?” Alexandra asked concerned.

  “Oh nothing, just some impatient drivers on the road, that’s all,” Morgan lied.

  “Well, let me get off the phone
so I don’t distract you. Call me when you get to your parents and tell everyone hello for me.” She smiled.

  “No problem.” Morgan sniffled.

  “Please be careful, Morgan. I love you.” Alexandra needed to let her know she was not alone and though Morgan appreciated it, she was not in the love mood and wanted to stay depressed for a while.

  “Bye,” she said and hung up the phone before Alexandra could say anything else.

  She hung up the phone and paid close attention to the road. Though she didn’t admit it, her veering off the road earlier scared her a bit, and left her nerves a little rattled.

  She reached over and turned the radio on to some easy listening to calm her down. She drove in silent contemplation for a while until the phone rang again. She reached over to get her purse where she had dropped her cell earlier before. When she didn’t see it immediately and it kept ringing, she released her right hand from the steering wheel and reached into her purse to fish it out. At the moment she grabbed it she knew something was wrong, it all seemed instantaneous. The blaring of the horns, the screaming of horror-struck onlookers in passing cars, she felt surreal and everything was in slow motion as she raised her eyes above the dashboard to see that she was completely in the lane of oncoming traffic; fear gripped her. Dread and distress sent off a distress of alarms in her but it was all too late. The shattering of the windshield sent splinters of glass into her face, head, and neck. She used her arms in an attempt to protect her face, releasing the steering wheel as it plunged into the oncoming vehicle. She saw herself in the most horrific way but there was nothing she could do. The air bag plopped out throwing her arms and neck back into the headrest of the driver’s seat and she could hear the bones in her arms crack from the impact. She closed her eyes to stop the streaming of blood from entering her pupils. Her neck snapped to the side and she couldn’t move, forced locked into position by her seat belt and the air bag, which felt like it was suffocating her. She could smell the scent of blood, smoke fumes, and gasoline as she struggled to move her legs and found that she couldn’t. Pain tore at her body and her skin felt as though it was on fire. Her mind took her away from the blow, shock replaced her refrain and her screams were locked in her throat before she blacked out.